Naimly.

Nico - 5/2/2014

I should probably stop being so surprised by how dark a foal’s coat becomes after a year. You were really ginger when you were born, and now you’re more of a steel grey, or the colour of a storm cloud filled with rain; just like Raffi. It is rather strange how much you look like him, actually, considering that you have different dads. You even act similar, what with all the kicking and rough-play.

You’re much more fun, though (don’t tell Raffi I said that). I don’t think I had a chance to play chase with Raphael, the closest was probably last winter when I ran about with him and Owain in the snow. That was a really great day - especially considering how much I whinge about snow usually. I remember letting you out for the first time into the field, you were such a clumsy goose yet you still bolted about as fast as your little legs could. I’m watching a documentary about Wild China literally right this second, you would love those fields. Actually, they’re so gigantic I’m not sure you can even call them ‘fields’; grass as far as the eye can see, probably the size of at least two Welsh counties. 

I’m glad you liked to play chase, not quite as amazing as Maggie (no offence, love, but Maggie was rather great at Tag), but it was fun. And I still can’t get over how you’re the only one who would let us clean your hooves as a foal, not to mention headcollars, rugs, and just being generally brilliant in every way - best foal. 

Sometimes your eyes show the whites and it looks creepy, but other times, especially when I wave to you as I’m going back in, you look so pretty and sweet that I never want to leave. And you always look at me when I leave, as though you’re acknowledging my wave. I really do love you more than perhaps any human, or extremely close anyway. And you always neigh when you see me. You’re so silly and funny. Best horse.

Take care of yourself, Nico, my wonderful little friend.

I love you.

• 8 Feb 2014

• #I promise I won't leave

I Did Things Yay

A lot of things have happened so far this year, mostly I’ve just been far too lazy to write anything about it, so I’ll just jot down a few things without going into much detail. I was also really interested in my weather posts from last year - having a lot of animals that live outdoors I tend to worry about them a lot. And our weather is pretty off when it comes to the news, so it’s nice to look back and see the bizarre patterns; like, it seems so strange that we had snow in April and May last year, but it’s been incredibly mild so far and I’m kind of surprised. 

OK, so! Um. Ok.

So far, I’ve started driving lessons and passed my theory test, I’m hoping, really hoping, that I’ll have passed my practical before I’m twenty-one. 

I’ve started a new module with the OU called U214, which just plain reminds me of Bono. It’s all about the English language. Just the English language. As in, stripping it down to its barest forms, discussing nouns and verbs, noun phrases and morphology, pronunciation and dialect, varieties. It also talks about how people relate to and think about English. Many people have had bad interactions with it due to colonialism, and others consider it a danger to their own language and cultural identity. Yet more think of English as the language of education and trade: to speak it as a second-language would open up many job opportunities within certain societies.

ANYWAY. Enough of that - I’m trying to write an essay today, essays on the brain.

On Friday the 24th of January, My mother and I had an argument (one of many recently) at the farm and she drove home without me. By car, it is approximately six miles to the farm. I didn’t want to walk along the roads, so I took all of the detours I could manage in order to walk through the woods and across the fields (in the end I only had to go along the road once for about a mile). In total, I think I might have walked nearly ten miles. Honestly, I’m really rather proud. I know I shouldn’t have had the argument, but I don’t think I could have done that without using anger and ridiculous pride as a way to boost myself.

When I think back, it was little less than a year ago that I started going out again at all. I have done so much this year. So frigging much. Wow. Just. Wow. Well done, me.

Coin wants me to go to Didney land with her. And I want to so much. I just don’t think I’m ready yet. And I’m embarrassed about myself - I’m not who I want to be yet, I think I could improve myself so much more. I don’t want Coin to be embarrassed by me, and I don’t want to feel like she might (even though I know she wouldn’t, she’s so cool), I want to like who I am. I think I could do that. Yeah, let’s do that.

Ily, self, keep on keeping on. <3

There’s more stuff but I forget, I’ll update later or make a new post. xxocoxoi

• 2 Feb 2014

Giggles into eternity.

• 7 Dec 2013

whatfulllipsyouhave:

edgebug:

so when i was 7 or 8 i’d “write letters to hermione granger” and set them out on the piano in the living room every night with my stuffed toy owl and every morning i’d have a letter from hermione back, sitting at the foot of my bed, and hermione and i corresponded like that for months and i’d just like to thank my mom for writing out a “letter from hermione” for me every single night

That is the cutest thing I’ve ever read oh my god

(via guineapigdescendant)

• 30 Nov 2013
• 484871

I Passed my University Exam

Woooooooooooooooooooooooo-

I honestly thought I was going to fail, it was really bad. And I’m not putting myself down when I say that, it was really bad; it was like a panic attack and pretty much everything I had learned in the past year just flew out of my mind. 

And I wrote in the margin where it said ‘do not write’ and then I circled it and drew a sad face under the circle and said 'I’m sorry, that was an accident :(’.

Well done, me. Clapclapclapclap.

But! This is even better than just passing, because it now means I can move on to my second year of studying! Yaaay! No, but I really am very excited, I didn’t want to have to take the entire course again and have to wait until next October.

The new module starts in February, I just hope that I can get back into gear by then, and stop being a lazy goose. There are five books or so that are recommended reads in the mean time, so hopefully they will help me focus my brain box. 

I’m so happy I can get into reading again, you have no idea. I’m actually absorbed in character stories again! I missed this so much.

Everything is swell.

• 25 Nov 2013

Anysauce

I’m reading a book which is pretty good so far. 

It does have quite a number of butts in it, though, unfortunately. And that’s ‘butts’ as in pretentious, self-obsessed noodledingers. 

I do have an enormous soft-spot for old school fantasy novels, though, and this one seems to have it all. 

We had a funeral last week in Southport, for my auntie Margaret. I feel bad saying this, but it was actually quite nice. My family (apart from my direct family) hardly ever talk to each other outside of funerals. Which now I think of it sounds incredibly morbid, but it’s more because we’re all too busy and caught-up in our own lives. We do get on, however, and it was really great to see everyone again. It makes me a bit sad that they’re all fairly old, and there are only two or three others around my age. There are so few of us now. I’ve always thought our family was rather small, but the way my mom and auntie talked about it, there used to be so much more of us. 

I’m going to stop now, before I get depressing.

Oh! Beth, the little girl from the farm, is really interested in Maggie - one of our horses. Well, I say little, she’s nearly taller than me, pfft. It’d be so great if they got on together. Maggie is such a lovely horse and she really needs someone nice to take her out on hacks and stuff.

I have my theory test booked for the ninth of December. It’s is brother dear’s birthday on the first, and my auntie and nana are coming over for Christmas. I don’t think you understand, this is really busy for me.

Also! I changed my URL. 

I don’t use this blog as much as I used to, or as much as I’d like. I will try and rectify this, but even so, I figured my other blog fit the URL better now-a-days. 

I wish I could make that one my original blog and this a side-blog instead, sigh. It would save on complications, anysauce.

• 25 Nov 2013